Today I had the honor of attending one of my college friend's weddings. She was getting married to one of my friends from high school, which is still kind of weird for me. The wedding was beautiful (and felt kinda short, actually, but you won't hear ME complaining about that), the bride gorgeous, the groom handsome. They're really cute together.
It reminded me of a post I had been meaning to write, about marriages. I've spoken to my JTEs several times about this, actually. Or well, one JTE in particular. This year, he sits two seats down from me in the first year section of the staff room at my base school, so it's easier to talk to him (last year, he sat in the third year section, which is pretty much on the opposite side of the room). We talk about a lot of different things, like alcohol, students, English/Japanese grammar, and cultural differences. Since he recently got married, he was telling me also a little bit about how Japanese weddings work, which, as it turns out, is a little different from the workings of an American or Chinese wedding.
Firstly, you don't give gifts. There's no gift registry, no wrapping stuff, no buying things for the new couple. You give them cash instead. And not just like one hundred dollars or however much you would have bought a gift for them for. Oh no. My teacher was telling me you give them a few hundred dollars plus, at least, depending on how close you are. I think gifts can also be average of like, 500 or 600 dollars or something high like that. Japanese weddings, to my understanding, also don't balloon up to epic attendances, as some weddings with large families have the tendency to do (I'm pretty sure mine will be one of them, if I ever have one).
Part of the reason, I think, is due to the fact that the bride and groom usually are the ones to foot the bill for everything - and I mean EVERYTHING. Not just the reception and ceremony and food and stuff, but also the cost of flying/train-ing/transporting their guests out as well as their lodgings. CRAZY. The huge gift makes a little bit more sense.
Also, the dresses. Women usually buy a wedding dress for the ceremony, as well as a different dress for the reception. And not any cheapo dress. Oh no. It's of the same caliber as the wedding dress, from what I heard. Or sometimes they'll do the ceremony in Japanese style, with the kimono and everything, and then have a western style dress for the reception or something. Either way. They're spending loads of money on a dress they will wear once, at most twice. Perhaps it's because they don't have prom to do that on. Who knows.
I'm glad I won't be socially obligated to do that. My extended family on my mom's side alone is around 50-60 people, since that's how many people we cram into our house/will be crammed into our house the day after christmas. I told my students this and they were all like "NO FREAKING WAY" and "YOUR HOUSE IS HUGE" My dad's side also has a lot of people. And that's not even counting friends.
Thankfully, that's not something I'll need to worry about for a long time.
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Woah, random, but I hear someone snoring through the wall. I'm not sure who it is, but wow. Wow. It's either my brother, my grandpa, or (unlikely) my grandma.
Also, I think I might die a little when I go back to okayama and it's FREEZING COLD. Being at home is making me spoiled. It was 60 degrees today, and sunny. I was able to wear just a shirt as long as I wasn't sitting in one place for a long time. Woaaaaaah.
I've missed California weather. :D
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